What do you tell someone? Do the best you can and we’ll see what happens the next time I see ya…
— grown up Bobby D
Chinese lobster guy?
— Dave on “It’s a trap!”
I drink to the landlady
Whose husband died
Of cancer.
She keeps one room clear
Of tenants,
And in that room she draws delicate
Studies of toads
That lick flies from the air
For food.
— C. G. Hanzlicek, “A Toast for the New Year,” Living It In
Gary Fisher
— Sarah
And your mother, who is she and who would you like her to be?
— Weird question by potential suitor to woman’s daughter.
My tire’s stiff.
— Jay after doing a bad turn in his minivan
“To staff the president and first lady at the holiday photo line is to observe humanity in its most awkward state,” said Bill Burton, a former top press official in Mr. Obama’s White House.
— Julie Hirschfeld Davis, “The White House Holiday Photo Line: A Tradition of Awkwardness,” The New York Times
Like most people have that amount of money?
— Small boy’s follow up question to “How much money do you and mommy have?”
And count the coyotes
Coming down the hill
To drink
Coyote 1 Coyote 2
— C. G. Hanzlicek, “What I Want Is,” Living It In
Our faces are just like muffin tins because they’re sitting and they’re ready to make shapes.
— Lily between a nap on the couch and sleep in the bed
Are you happy with it?
— Jason
Late
I tried to convince myself that I wasn’t really as mundane as I felt. After all, having a colonial-style house in Pikesville, Maryland, two wonderful children aged three and five respectively, a beagle hound, and a husband who is a sales executive for the Mayfair Paper Cup Company doesn’t necessarily make a person a statistic.
— Avy Offit, “To Talk About Love”
Look it’s a tourist. Ah! Lucky!
— Lily
What is the difference between plot and narrative?
— Student, The Savages
I brought a bundt cake.
— David White
Wow I don’t realize that everything I do revolves around Andrew sometimes.
— Lily in iMovie clip 148.mov created 5/28/09 11:57pm
It was a hundred degrees in the shade. I walked for five days with no water. Then I saw it. A pretty pond. I bent down to take a drink, and these crocks launched out of the water. One crock bit me on the face. Ain’t no way I wasn’t its supper. Except for one thing. I wasn’t ready to die that day.
— Butch (Sam Elliott), The Good Dinosaur
Let me pull up the list.
— Akshay on a list on his phone of things to look for.
When I grew up nobody had teeth.
— Sidney