Tuesday, July 18, 2017
Beach ball.
— Jason Fulford
Monday, July 17, 2017
Grow a pair.
— To The Bone
Sunday, July 16, 2017
Sometimes we would barter. A trip to St. Barts was paid for with a year’s worth of Burmese hummus and shrimp gumbo.
— Tamara Shopsin, Arbitrary Stupid Goal
Saturday, July 15, 2017
That’s ok cuz the shelves won’t sway… He likes to wear shorts that are sweat pants. And he’s also is cool with killing ants… He wants to add bubbly water to his tea. But that sounds stupid if you ask me.
— Lily singing a song before bed
Friday, July 14, 2017
Thank God the girls are adults.
— Woman to another woman on Lex and 43rd
Thursday, July 13, 2017
Wearing his shower cap as a blindfold, Cap'n Jack’s hands were always full like Lady Justice’s.
— Tamara Shopsin, Arbitrary Stupid Goal
Wednesday, July 12, 2017
It’s when I need to get the same free stuff the second time.
— Jay on fake glasses
Tuesday, July 11, 2017
No one ever says you’re making that language up.
— Sid on making a language up to get people out of the whirlpool
Monday, July 10, 2017
You’ve got some funny guy in my area there.
— Maggie to Paul on Karl who sits in her old cube
Sunday, July 9, 2017
All ketchup is is a bottle of stuff with a sticker.
— Lily on ketchup
Saturday, July 8, 2017
I just want to bathe myself in birds.
— Lily on baths
Friday, July 7, 2017
Like I talk to my cats?
— MET security guard after other security guard gives her advice to “do it authoritatively”
Thursday, July 6, 2017
Did you see what we have!?
— Extremely nice manager of Murray’s pointing to Sloppy Blue on special menu. She also remembered my name and stretched the special another two weeks.
Wednesday, July 5, 2017
Bridgeman.
— Henry on source of great painting he found
Tuesday, July 4, 2017
D.S.
— Doug to desk, House of Cards
Monday, July 3, 2017
I love birds.
— Emily
Sunday, July 2, 2017
He delivered me!
— Lily on meeting man who delivered her
Saturday, July 1, 2017
Who doesn’t love hats?
— Baby Driver
Friday, June 30, 2017
Iced Matte.
— Rincon Argentino in Cold Spring, NY
Thursday, June 29, 2017
I usually just sing happy birthday to myself when I’m stressed.
— Lily on test day